Cereal Experiments: Akane
by Zorknot
Summary: Fusion with Lain. Akane eats her own cooking for the first time...or at least the first time she can REMEMBER...


Cereal Experiments: Akane  
by Zorknot  
  
DISCLAIMER: Ranma ½ and Serial Experiments: Lain are   
not mine.   
  
NOTE: This was done for an hour challenge. It turned   
out better than I thought it would but still...  
  
Anyway I hope you enjoy.  
~~~~~[Start 6:02 pm]~~~~~  
  
Akane wasn't feeling too good. Her head was swimming   
through a strange fog, and she seemed to see odd   
things in the shadows as she walked. She had tried to   
make breakfast for Ranma again. It was supposed to be   
a Belgian waffle with fruit topping, only she thought   
it was a little bland so she added wasabi and salt   
and denatured alcohol and a drop or two of paint   
thinner... and some bits of hemp from that rope Uncle   
Genma was making...  
  
It quivered ominously on the plate as she gave it to   
her fiancee, who had after all promised to eat her   
food without complaining so much.   
  
He took a small bite, closing his eyes. His face   
turned green, blue, red, and white. Then it   
was a curious plaid color. Finally he passed out on   
the floor. Akane really hated how Ranma over-  
exaggerated how bad her cooking was. Surely it   
couldn't be that bad...  
  
She put a small portion, only a crumb really on her   
fork and put it in her mouth. She spent the rest of   
the time before school trying to wash the taste out   
in vain.   
  
Now she was walking alone to Furinken. The power   
lines above her seemed to hum very loudly which   
aggravated her headache and those shadows...some kind   
of weird space scene seemed to swirl in them.   
  
Akane really WAS a bad cook. She had to face it. She   
would ask her Home Ec teacher today for some lessons   
maybe...  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
Akane sat in Math class. The teacher's droning   
meaning little to her as she tried to listen through   
the thrumming in her brain. Then the numbers and   
letters on the chalkboard seemed to swirl around into   
new words:  
  
"Fiber is good for you" They seemed to say.  
  
Akane looked away from the board down at her desk.   
She lifted her hand up to look at the lines in her   
palm...and a strange gray smoke emitted out of her   
fingers and dissipated in the air above her.   
  
She should have listened to Ranma. Akane was starting   
to wonder if she'd ever recover from this.   
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
Later that day Sayuri and Yuka accosted Akane during   
lunch. Akane was still trying to clear her head, when   
they asked. "Akane...have you ever gone to a   
place..."  
  
Akane looked at her friend in confusion, Sayuri   
seemed to have pyramids tattooed all over her face.  
  
"Oh come on, 'yuri, She couldn't of been there. That   
girl was completely different!" Yuka, who had the   
same pyramids, only they were upside down said.  
  
"Yeah I suppose you're right," Sayuri nodded,   
"Still...hey do want to go with us to this cooking   
club?"  
  
"Um...sure, but are you sure you want me...I...I   
can't cook." Akane said sadly.  
  
"Well you can just watch then. We just thought you   
might want to see it. It's called Fiberia and it   
opens late at night, from nine to two in the   
morning."  
  
"Okay."  
  
"Great we'll pick you up at eight how does that   
sound?"  
  
Akane nodded. And the two girls left. Fiberia...why   
did that name seem so familiar?  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
"Onimusha-sensei, can you help me?" Akane pleaded to   
her Home Ec teacher. "I try to get better at cooking   
but no matter what I do it all turns out terrible!"  
  
"Well, surely there must be something you can   
make..." Onimusha said a little nervous.  
  
"I once made some curry rice that was good, but that   
was only with magical water that had supernatural   
curative properties!"  
  
Onimusha nodded. "You should start small. Have you   
tried making cereal?"  
  
"Cereal?" Akane asked.  
  
"Yes. All you have to do is pour milk in the cereal   
and you're done. Surely you can do that."  
  
"I suppose I could try..."  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
After school Akane went to the supermarket. She was   
impressed by how many different types of cereal there   
were. Shredded Wheat, Captain Crunch, and Rice   
Krispies all sounded a little too dangerous...   
Finally she settled on Lucky Charms.   
  
After all, she could cook with magical water, and   
the box did say the cereal was "magically delicious."   
Maybe it would work.   
  
She was still feeling a little woozy though from her   
waffles that morning...  
  
As she walked past the meat section she stopped...   
the meat seemed to be trying to break out of the   
plastic...trying to get free. Blood starting welling   
up in each of the packages, pushing against the   
boundary with greater and greater force...Then the   
blood exploded over everything.  
  
"AAAAAAAAHH!" Akane screamed and stumbled to the   
floor.  
  
"Miss?" A matronly woman with a cart asked Akane,   
"Are you alright?"  
  
Akane looked around. There wasn't any blood, it had   
all been a bizarre hallucination. "I'm...fine   
thanks," she lied. Picking up the box of cereal she   
hurried to the checkout line.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
Genma's stomach growled as he played Go with his   
buddy Soun. He eyed Kasumi staring dazedly into the   
blank TV screen. "Kasumi-chan, is supper going to be   
ready soon?"  
  
"I'm afraid not, Uncle Saotome, Akane is   
experiment...I mean cooking in the kitchen. She   
hasn't come out for five hours now."  
  
Genma and Soun looked at each other. "You know,   
Tendo," Genma said with a nervous smile, "I feel like   
eating out tonight how about you?"  
  
"Yes, a good beef bowl would be good to soothe the   
nerves," Soun laughed. A second later they were both   
gone.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
Akane stirred the contents of the bowl with her spoon,   
wearing nothing but her underwear to cut down on the   
static electricity. She put the hose from the natural   
gas into the bowl and it seemed to be bubbling nicely   
through the cereal. Finally she felt it was time to   
add the milk. She poured it in and it hissed loudly.  
  
"Hello, Lucky." She greeted her creation.  
  
"Hello, Akane," It greeted back.  
  
Ranma sat in cursed form in the doorway, her hair   
disheveled, her eyes sunken. She held her hand to her   
ear..."Beep beep! Caaaaaaaaaall" She said. "Beep   
beep! Caaaaaaaall."  
  
~~~~~[End 6:55]~~~~~  
  
Some small changes made after challenge. Thanks to   
Gary, Kara, BurgerBill, and PrettyJoshie for their   
comments in .irc.  
  
Feedback greatly appreciated. R is for reviews...that's   
good enough for me...:-) 


End file.
